Life for you might be simple. Maybe you wander through your life going from day to day doing the same thing. Each day the same as the last…and the next. Maybe you never wonder if there is anything more that you could and possibly should experience and enjoy. Maybe you are completely satisfied with your life as it is now…or at least you tell yourself that. Isn’t that the way it is supposed to be?
If you are, you already stopped reading…
So I can be confident that you are here because something in your life experience is not exactly what you planned, not what you expected and possibly not what you want at all.
It is interesting that many people seem to stay satisfied with the life they settled for when they can’t possibly be happy with the way things are.
Why would anyone settle with being put up with when they could so easily be loved and appreciated instead?
How much effort does it take to be appreciated for who you are, rather than for what you do?
It is a major mindset shift for some people.
If your spouse or partner is not one to appreciate you, the problem is theirs…and yours.
Your actions and reactions come from years of conditioning and programming. How you act and respond to events in your life began even before you were born. When you feel threatened, you react in a specific and mostly predictable way. Your reactions come from a small set of learned responses.
You might discover that you react with violent angry outbursts when someone threatens your safety or attacks your character. You might even physically attack anyone who disrespects or shames you. Many people find themself in trouble with the law over and over again because their explosive responses bring physical harm to others. You probably don’t have this specific problem, but it is very likely that another of your responses to life circumstances is holding you hostage.
Unless you develop the ability to step back from the events that happen in your life, the inputs that trip your triggers and push your buttons, you will remain stuck in the programming you developed to cope with life.
Coping mechanisms are those little tools we developed in our growing up years to feel okay when things happen to us. We long to feel loved and accepted, to be cherished, to belong. If we do not feel accepted or acceptable, we take out one or more of the coping tricks we have to make up a story we tell ourself – to be okay.
Maybe you use a little alcohol from time to time to take away some of the pain. You did realize that it’s pain we so often deal with. Our disappointments, fears, failures and shame. We use tools we have to mask pain and increase pleasure in our life. When we feel unacceptable, the amount of work needed to cope is significant. Dealing with major setbacks and pain, our subconscious’ job is to counter with enough ‘cope’ to again feel okay.
Have you ever had someone belittle and make fun of you or someone you know?
Do you think that person might be trying to improve how they feel about themself by making fun of you or your friend to ‘fix’ their very low opinion of themself? The problem most often isn’t your problem, it is their problem projected on to you.
The coping mechanisms most people choose are subconscious reactions and responses to make them feel okay.
Blind Spots – When what you cannot see, you cannot see.
Who in your life helps you tell yourself the truth about you?
Every successful person has at least one coach or mentor who helps them deal with the reality they see and make choices to become the best they can be.
LifeShift Academy™ will help you be your very best.